I'm sorry to laugh when you said she put the butter in her mouth but imagining it then imagining the look on you two's face made me crack up!!
I mean all the behaviors she showed is completely normal behavior BUT it seems they need a little direction in the parenting section. I don't think I would take my best friend to Disney UNLESS I was ready to dedicate the trip for her enjoyment sort of speak and just do things she liked especially because she's a single gal and I'm married with kids and it's just a different dynamic completely. We would be cool at a Barbeque, beach or any other one day outing but when you're doing a big trip like that, you gotta even out the dynamic. Unfortunately, sometimes that doesn't even work. LOL.
You do sound like you've had a great time though despite all that.
I'm confused about TOT, was there a long wait or no wait at all?