Stressing over Wedding and Honeymoon About This Page:

[aurora_ca]

I am 46 days out from the wedding in Smithville, NJ and a honeymoon in Disney World. I havenot been to Disney World since 1997 and my future husband has not been there ever and I want this trip to be the best trip ever for both of us. I want him to fall in love with Disney the way I love Disney and Mickey Mouse. I am so stressed right now that I can not get my engagment ring on and I am retaining water. I have a doctor's appointment on Thursday, but I am started to think, if I don't have a nervous breakdown by the wedding and honeymoon it will be a miracle. My job is stressful as well, I am doing the work of three people that got fired and every day more responsible is put on me. Any suggestions on reducing stress would be greatly appreciated.

[Colexis Mom]

[vince730]

So sorry to hear

I've found the best thing to do when you start to panic & stress over the vacation is to step back...take a few days and put the trip the the side and focus on your work...then start back in and prioritize what is most important to do for planning and get to work

[chezp]

[stardust190]

You're not alone. I've got 4 1/2 months until my wedding/honeymoon and everyday it gets more stressful. I've found that taking days off from wedding tasks helps a lot! Plan a wedding free day where you don't talk about the wedding/honeymoon and just do something fun with your fiance like you used to do before the wedding planning took over. I find that helps a ton! We've taken on a lot of wedding do it yourself projects as we're trying to save money and it always seems like none of it is getting done. Taking time off from the projects helps me see how much is actually getting done. I find if I'm in "wedding mode" all the time I only feel like nothing is getting done when it actually is.

Sorry your work is stressful as well. Its hard planning a wedding and working especially if your job is stressful. Its my busy time at work too so I completely feel your pain. Unfortunately, at least for me, there is little that can be done about workload/stresses. I'm just looking at it this way: I've got huge wedding/honeymoon bills that I need to pay and my job helps me with that. It helps a little to think of it that way. And I just keep reminding myself that there will be a vacation along with the wedding. I'm actually lucky enough to get 3 weeks off for my wedding so I've got the entire week before and two weeks after to re-group.

I'm trying not to stress about the honeymoon and just let Disney take care of it. It's going to be a great vacation no matter what! I've planned some dinner reservations, but that's about it. We'll figure out the rest when we get there. If I were you I'd just let the honeymoon happen and not worry about it at all! Its your reward for getting through the wedding. And you'll be there with your new hubby, what could be better than that?

Hang in there. Either way you're getting married and thats what matters right?

[theschuhows]

I understand the stress of wedding/honeymoon planning. We did our wedding in Vegas and honeymoon in WDW. First when you are feeling stressed about the wedding, take a step back and look at your future husband and think about the real reasons you are getting married and not the stress of it. Remeber he will love you even if the colors of the napkins don't match the table cloths perfectly. You will be beautiful that day and that's what matters.

As far as your trip to WDW goes, remember that it should be magical, not stressful. If you want your future hubby to love WDW and Mickey as much as you do make sure that you show him why it means so much to you. If it's past trips and memories share them with him. If it's the movies, then pop some popcorn and curl up and watch them together with a smile and a warm blanket. Take advantage of the Cast Members at the resort you plan on staying at. Tell everyone when you call and make your planning and reservations that it's your honeymoon and they sometimes add a little bit of that Disney magic that will only take the stress much further away!

Just remember, you only get married once. Your future husband will love you no matter what and enjoy this time because when you look back you won't believe how fast it went by.

[BeckiO5]

Congrtulations on your Engagement and Wedding Planning. I'm sorry you're experiencing all the stress of 3 people's jobs in one at work, besides Wedding/Honeymoon Work. I'm actually a Wedding Planning Student right now as we speak and it isn't easy. Wedding planning is stressful. Like previously mentioned, take some time away from Wedding things. Take a walk with your fiance or see a movie you really want to see or have a date night out or in. Enjoy being together.

I can speak of my DH and I trying to plan a Wedding when I was pregnant with DS and that was extremely stressful, even just buying our rings, getting our marriage license, finding a Justice of the Peace to marry us (sorry we did take the easy way out) and a nice dinner after, but when we got married and being 7 months along, the only stress I needed was making sure our baby was healthy and would come out alright. We're planning a bigger Vow Renewal for family and close friends and even that stresses us on on how are we going to pay for everything? We haven't gone on our Honeymoon yet, b/c we haven't had the time or money for it, but our siblings' weddings were more important for us to attend (given I was a BM in my sister's wedding and DH is the BM in his brother's wedding so we had to be there) and my lil bro is being Bar Mitzvahed this year so those events were more important to save for than a Honeymoon right away (which we couldn't travel anyway b/c of my pregnancy), but I try not to talk about planning since I know it drives DH crazy.

Besides us fellow Passporters who are here to help, if you have a Wedding Planner, they're great for stress reduction and venting to. It's part of their job. Do you have alone time at home where you can make your own spa masks, enjoy a warm bubble bath with a pillow, a glass of wine, maybe some grapes, a book to enjoy and just get some "Me" time in there? That might help you ease your mind a little bit and help you relax too. If you need someone on here to vent to, please feel free to private message me. Good luck and I hope you can find something to ease your stress.

[DanZuke]

This past Monday was my 1-month anniversary and we recently returned from our honeymoon on DCL and WDW. We were getting crazy stressed out in the months leading up to the wedding and it got bad enough that we both kinda had to realize there was no reason to get so stressed out. Things are not all going to go according to plan. Not everything is going to work out. And that's ok. We had to keep reminding ourselves that on the evening of May 22nd, we'd be married no matter how the day unfolded. If my suit caught on fire and she tripped and fell through the cake we'd still be just as married as if everything went perfect.

That distance allowed us not to get so stressed out over the details and to just enjoy the whole thing more. Going with the waves is alot easier than fighting it.

On the day of the wedding, we got to the hall and found out the music system was busted! SO we had no music for the ceremony at all. But instead of freaking out, since we were taking the "being married is the important part not the ceremony" we were able to just roll with it and as she started walking down the aisle I started humming the wedding march song and everyone joined in! That problem and rolling with it left us with one of the more memorable moments of the day!

I guess my advice is to remember that you're having a wedding to be married, not to have the wedding. No matter what happens during the ceremony itself it all ends with you being married, and that's the important part. Being able to take the issues with a grain of salt enables you to laugh about it later as opposed to crying.

My wife had her share of mini-breakdowns leading up to it but I just kept reminding her how happy I was to be getting married and that's all that mattered.

When all else fails focus on the honeymoon!

[mickey0823]

I think that stress and panic is something that just about every bride goes through; I know that I sure did! I would try to just focus on your work right now and everything else will fall into place!

[kris10rocks]

I remember the feeling like it was yesterday. I pretty much did EVERYTHING for our wedding and honeymoon by myself. My bridesmaids were terrible so I couldn't even count on them to help me with anything. I was working a stressful job 50+ hours a week.

I agree with another poster who said to take a couple of days to not think or talk about the wedding/honeymoon. If you can take a day off to relax and spend some time alone that helped me. I'm a list maker so I made a list in order of priority and marked things off as I got them done. It made me feel better to see the list get smaller and I felt like I was accomplishing something.

If you need some recommendations for romantic and fun things to do I'm more than happy to offer you some suggestions. You are going to have a wonderful honeymoon. Disney is fantastic! We now try to go back every year to celebrate our anniversary.

[Ariel in a doom buggy]

Congrats! My husband and I married in South Jersey 2 years ago this month... the best advice that I ever received while planning my wedding is now something that I live by in every aspect of my life. When you are planning all you can think of are the "what if's"... if something doesn't go as planned, no one will know but you! I have been a part of weddings where the bride complained about everything and it completely took away from the whole experience. When planning my wedding, I managed to get a stye in my lower eye lid from the stress of planning, getting my new house livable, and the fact that my mom's dress hadn't come yet, but.... once I relaxed and let things happen I was fine! The more you stress about the wedding and WDW, the less you will enjoy the ride. Your wedding day will already go so fast, you need to slow down an enjoy the journey. I'm sure your soon-to-be husband will enjoy WDW. He may not love it for the same reasons as you, but he will love it because you love it and it makes you happy. We're going for our wedding anniversary. Not because it's my husbands first choice of a vacation, but because he knows that it is my "special" place!

So the best advice I can give is to relax and let things happen. Things will be perfect, and I'm sure you will be a beautiful bride. NJ brides all are!

[PRColey]

Congratulations on getting married!! I got married April 08. I made everything for my wedding but I had some great bridesmaids that were helpful when needed. I also was working as a teacher and coaching high school cheerleading. There was stress at work but I found relief in planning the honeymoon and wedding. So find something you can do to relax (read, work on a puzzle, watch movies, etc.) Do take time to relax and remember that you are planning a day but it is more important to focus on the days after the wedding day. I echo whoever says that only you will know when something doesn't go correctly. Have someone who knows exactly what to do during that day so you can just worry about having a good time and enjoy spending time with the guests and your husband. Enjoy every moment because it goes very fast (we planned for over a year and it flew by). Don't worry about WDW I am sure if you love Disney your husband-to-be will love it too!!