How to tell DH he's not invited? About This Page:

[Beautiful Mother]

I've booked airline tix for DD DD's friend and me for a birthday trip. Last night DH said his trip is finished in Tucson the day we fly out, so he can meet us!!! (DD & friend are in their 20's). How do I tell him this is really a girl's trip and he's not invited? He's a super guy and a super dad, but for many reasons, he shouldn't come. One of the most important is that DD needs to know she can do things without a guy along to protect her, but how do I tell him without hurting his feelings?

[Sandra Bostwick]

I don't know your DH well enough to take a stab at that one, but you sure have my sympathies.

We can't always get what we want and we can't always keep others from feeling disappointed.

[Ceara's mawmaw]

Not sure there is anyway not to disappoint him....
but as soon as you can, sit him down explain that it is a girls trip. Point out that he is not a girl(comic relief), that your dd needs the experience without a male around and it is something that you and your dd need to do. I do empathize I had to do the same thing with my dh when my mom and I went to Vegas. He was disappointed but understood that I needed that time with my mom. She is getting elderly and I wanted to make sure that she and I had some time just her and me. I will send good thoughts and pixies that he understands and isn't too disappointed.

[guitardiva]

Tell him it's girl bonding time. You want to connect to your daughter and celebrate your shared womanhood. He will run for the hills then, lol

[HiddenMickey]

Just tell him what you told us. He'll understand. Sure he'll be disappointed...but you could make it up to him by planning another trip!

[saremca]

How would you want him to tell you that you weren't invited? I would try to think of how I'd want to be told, and go with that.

[Colexis Mom]

[emtpej]

Maybe he can extend his trip, or plan to do something with the guys, or a missions project, or he can work on a project at home, (with a reasonable budget) that he can't do with all the gals cluttering things up! So basically, distract him with something else...

[Tigger71]

Arrange for one of his friends to ask him to do something in the middle of your trip. Suggest to his buddy that they haven't been (fishing, hunting, car racing etc) and maybe they may want to do it whilst you're away so they can have the house to themselves or get cleaned up by the time you get back etc. You could always suggest all the girlie things you have planned and hope he tries to back out himself!

[eff051102]

Is there something that he has been wanting to do but hasn't had the time? If my
DD and I go somewhere without my DH I will make it a point to get him to do
something that he has wanted to do but didn't have the time. Either golf, movies
or just staying around the house without having to do any honeydos and sleep
in. I would point out everything that he could do while also telling him that this
trip is really important to you and gives you some special mother/daughter time.

[scottjs]

I like the idea of planning a seperate trip with him.

[chezp]

I can only suggest telling him what you said here and I like the idea of a separate trip with him - that would soften the blow.

[Beautiful Mother]

I talked with him this pm--just like above. The trip he's coming off of is business and when we get back he'll be heading to DC--business. So, he was disappointed that he won't see me for two weeks! Okay--everybody can go AHHH and OHHH he's so good!!! He is!! That's why we've been together 30 years. There are places he doesn't want me to come along-even though he says he does, he doesn't. Guy things. And he'll be Disney'd out after December.

So he's okay with it. Now I've got to get the room before the close ones are all gone. I'm booking each separately this time to save the $$. Don't think I need a package.

[emtpej]

Originally Posted by Beautiful Mother

I talked with him this pm--just like above. The trip he's coming off of is business and when we get back he'll be heading to DC--business. So, he was disappointed that he won't see me for two weeks! Okay--everybody can go AHHH and OHHH he's so good!!! He is!! That's why we've been together 30 years. There are places he doesn't want me to come along-even though he says he does, he doesn't. Guy things. And he'll be Disney'd out after December.

So he's okay with it. Now I've got to get the room before the close ones are all gone. I'm booking each separately this time to save the $$. Don't think I need a package.

cool

[saremca]

I'm glad you talked to him and it went okay. And it really is sweet that he will miss you. It's great to still be in love like that after many years together.