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Old 07-03-2008, 08:38 PM   #1 (permalink)
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How old is too old?

Danielle's post about her little boy growing, but reassuring her that he was still her little boy reminded me of something. My DD has always had a plush animal of some kind since birth. She started out with Ted E. Bear and when he was ready to retire, we took him to the washing machine for his "bath" and after a tumble in the dryer, he went into a memory box and Bun E. Rabbit appeared in DD's bed. Bun E. stayed with her for a few years and then about the time he was ready to retire, my uncle gavse DD a TY Beanie Baby rabbit named Grace. Since that is also my DD's name, the rabbit became Baby Grace. BG came into out home when DD was 5 and I was in a coma. DD would lay BG on my bed with me and tell everyone that BG would make me better. Obviously, BG did her job well as that was 7 1/2 years ago. BG goes with us everywhere. She has been to Girl Scout camp with DD and to WDW with both of us. When DD takes her state mandated standardized tests, BG is in D was waiting in the wings. Needless to say, BG is very much considered a member of the family.

DD is now 12 1/2 and still treats BG as a family member with feelings. She got upset when FDH and I were telling her about a new Wii game we had bought. The game has you trying to catch evil bunnies that escaped. Apparently, BG was offended by the term "evil bunnies". I am beginning to think that it is time for BG to retire, but I am really unsure about how to go about that or if I should even attempt it. Do you think DD will grow out of this? She will go for a couple of weeks without BG when she loses her in the sheets or if BG falls off the bed and goes between the bed and wall. What do you think?
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Old 07-03-2008, 08:42 PM   #2 (permalink)
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I think BG got your DD through a very bad time in her life (your coma) so she is comforting to your DD. I don't think there is anything wrong with her still carrying it and I really believe she'll grow out of it. I sucked my thumb until I was about her age and I started growing out of it shortly after when I had sleepovers and such - not something you want your pre-teen friends to find out She'll probably run into to peer type pressure and start letting go. In the mean time, let her enjoy the comfort. Just my opinion.
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Old 07-03-2008, 08:45 PM   #3 (permalink)
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I'm sure she'll get rid of it when she's ready to Since it's not really doing any harm, I'd let it be
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Old 07-03-2008, 08:47 PM   #4 (permalink)
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I think Judi is right. Even pre-teens (I have only had experiences with a boy, though) need to have part of their childhood to fall back on, no matter how hard they are trying to act all grown up.
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Old 07-03-2008, 09:06 PM   #5 (permalink)
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I'm the worst person to ask. I had a stuffed Snoopy that I slept with from the age of 8 till I got married at 25. When DD was 2, I passed it to her, and he's still going strong. I just think as you get older it's something you get used to sleeping with. I only used it at home or on vacation, never brought him to sleepovers. He's lived in 5 states, and travelled to over 20 other ones, as well as to 17 countries! He's a memory keeper for me, and it means the world that I got to pass him on!
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Old 07-03-2008, 09:10 PM   #6 (permalink)
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Thanks for the advice. I am very reluctant to retire BG, so this gives me some comfort to know that I don't need to.
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Old 07-03-2008, 09:32 PM   #7 (permalink)
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Pam, if it's any comfort, my girls (10 and 8) still carry around their 'Precious Ones' (three stuffed kitties.) They have been EVERYWHERE with us.

Now, just about the time DD turned 10, she relegated her Precious Ones to a spot on the shelf in her bedroom. Every once in a while they'll make a trip with us to the store or the park - but mostly she leaves them on the shelf. DD 8 is outraged at her sister and still carries her POs around all day.

And (drum roll, please) - it's not a stuffed animal, but I have an crocheted afghan a member of the family made for me when I was twelve. It is either on the foot of my bed or on the sofa in the family room. When we go on vacation, the afghan comes along in the car. Everytime I see it, it is a comforting reminder of my childhood - one of the oldest possessions I have.

So - don't worry. Your DD will grow out of it....or not. (Just teasing - she'll know when it's time to let BG retire.)

I think I'll go read "The Velveteen Rabbit" to my girls now...
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Old 07-03-2008, 09:39 PM   #8 (permalink)
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I think I'll go read "The Velveteen Rabbit" to my girls now...

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Old 07-04-2008, 03:29 AM   #9 (permalink)
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Nimros View Post
Pam, if it's any comfort, my girls (10 and 8) still carry around their 'Precious Ones' (three stuffed kitties.) They have been EVERYWHERE with us.

Now, just about the time DD turned 10, she relegated her Precious Ones to a spot on the shelf in her bedroom. Every once in a while they'll make a trip with us to the store or the park - but mostly she leaves them on the shelf. DD 8 is outraged at her sister and still carries her POs around all day.

And (drum roll, please) - it's not a stuffed animal, but I have an crocheted afghan a member of the family made for me when I was twelve. It is either on the foot of my bed or on the sofa in the family room. When we go on vacation, the afghan comes along in the car. Everytime I see it, it is a comforting reminder of my childhood - one of the oldest possessions I have.

So - don't worry. Your DD will grow out of it....or not. (Just teasing - she'll know when it's time to let BG retire.)

I think I'll go read "The Velveteen Rabbit" to my girls now...
I too have several quilts my Grandma Amato made me. They are constantly on display and in use. One was gifted to Tommy when he was born, one to Autumn when she was born. The other is on my bed and I always use it. It helps me feel close to her since she's been gone since 1996...boy do I miss her. I also still have my very first Teddy Bear on a shelf in my room...every once in awhile, when Tom is working nights, I suggle with Teddy.
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Old 07-04-2008, 05:30 AM   #10 (permalink)
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I agree with Judi and Sue. It isn't doing her any harm, is comforting, and she will be acting grown up soon enough. My DD is 14 and is still transitioning from child to pre-adult. (at home, that is; with friends, she's all about being grown up.) It doesn't surprise me at all that she doesn't like the evil bunny game. I, on the other hand, have battled those suckers for years in my garden and would like a good go at them!
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Old 07-04-2008, 07:36 AM   #11 (permalink)
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You're never too old! Granted, this is coming from someone who still sleeps with a favorite quilt from when she was younger...
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Old 07-04-2008, 10:36 AM   #12 (permalink)
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DD is 23 and her teddy bear still sleeps with her. When she went to France 3 years ago for a month, Teddy joined her. Now she is in culinary school in NY and Teddy is there. DD is very well adjusted but sometimes you need a little comfort from an old friend.
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Old 07-04-2008, 08:18 PM   #13 (permalink)
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My oldest DD is 25. She has a stuffed dog that my dad gave her when she was 2. He sits on her dresser most of the time, but every time she is hospitalized, he goes with. She just had an unexpected stay at the hospital last week, and she sent her then fiance to fetch the dog (at 2 AM!!). I'm surprised she didn't take the dog to her wedding.

Your DD will let go of her bunnie when she's ready. Maybe you'll be able to convince her to set the bunnie on her dresser, so it can keep watch over her?
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Old 07-04-2008, 09:09 PM   #14 (permalink)
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Stitch came with me and did the WDW Half Marathon three years ago! I would let her set the limits in her own way and on her own time schedule. Eventually peer pressure will force her to maybe not be so open about it.
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Old 07-04-2008, 09:46 PM   #15 (permalink)
 
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My DS and DDinlaw have their childhood teddy bears on display in their home (DS's is still looking the same as when he was little--with a hole in the nose where the bear hit the night light). I was kind of hoping to keep his teddy bear for memories but apparantly, so was DS!

My DD has the teddy bear her hubby gave her when they were going steady and the bear that she received after my mom died that used to be hers.

All in all, you are never too old for a stuffed animal friend!
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