<sigh>....I don't know where or how to start this.... About This Page:

[emtpej]

We are trying to raise some sons who will not get a daughter in trouble...
It is a tough time of life, with your body telling you one thing and your heart and mind telling you something else, those new hormones are powerful!

I hope it all works out so everyone's life improves.

[Danielle Harmon]

Oh Jooki! I remember the last incident too. I had hoped and prayed that all would work out well. I have no advice, I think your plan of action is spot on. I would research any legal action or charges for that other woman (mom or mother is too good for her) she should never have turned your daughter out in the wee hours to walk 4-5 miles home...OMG...the things that could have happened...does this person NOT watch the news?

I'm sending you lots of pixies and prayers sweetheart!

[CelticChick]

[theJordans]

I`ll send you a PM.

[Cheriemek]

As the mother of 4 daughters, I feel your pain. I hope your DD gains some wisdom.

[lukeandbrookesmom]

Sent you a PM Jooki-

[mtstranscribe]

I can totally sympathize. My husband's daughter is pulling the same stunts and we had her on total lockdown. We've done everything we know to show her love, respect, and attention. We take her places and spend time with her but none of it sinks in. She is 15 and has done drugs, slept with strange boys, and steals. We have had her in counseling and even the counselor told us that there is something deeply wrong with this child ,and I just cant fix her. We took everything away from her priviledge wise and tried to get her some help, so she and her real mother call the police and accuse us of child abuse. The police come to our door and dont believe a word of it and cart her off to juvenile. The next day, a judge gives my stepdaughter to her mother who has seen her daughter 6 times in 9 months (she only lives a couple miles away) and who has just been arrested for DUI. So now we can do nothing but watch this 15 year old self-destruct. My husband is heart broken. You can be the best parent in the world and sometimes kids rebel. All you can do it stick to your guns and make sure there are consequences for their bad behavior. They may hate you for a few years but when they finally grow up they will see that you truly loved them and wanted what was best for them. I wish you all the best and totally understand what you are going through. Although I havent had this problem with my kids, my stepdaughter meant a lot to me and I cared about her, and I see how heartbroken my husband is.

[Cats'N'Dogs]

[Nimros]

I talked this over with my 18 year old DD. The first thing she said was, "How could she go off and leave her younger brother in the house alone - what if something had happened to him???" That might be a talking point you'd like to bring up.

I am still trying to figure out why the other 'mom' didn't have enough brain cells to give your DD a ride home or at least have her wait at their house for a ride. It didn't even sink in when I first read your post - probably because I couldn't fathom someone doing that.

My DH's first reaction was, "Where was her BF when she was getting kicked out of the house? If that had been MY girlfriend, there'd be NO WAY I'd let her walk home alone - and no mother in the world could have stopped me."

Wish there was a solution I could offer... as hard as it's going to be, I feel like everyone involved (parents and kids) need to sit down and have a heart-to-heart about this. You can't condone their actions, but gosh darn it, if your old enough to do it, you're old enough to talk about it. And you're old enough to talk about accepting the consequences of your actions.

More

[fourdrawfs]

oh teenagers,, I know I have one and a 21 yr old... the things they put us though..talk about grey hairs,,,I have plenty...you will work though this just hang in there...

[tinker_me_happy]

Cathy has a point... the boy cares enough to hop on her in the sack but not to walk her home????????????

[Tigger71]

I sincerely hope you feel better for sharing but I'm sorry I have no advice.

[Jookiba]

Originally Posted by eff051102

I would talk with the MOM and let her know that if her perfect son and your
DD make a baby.....you will be coming after them for any and all support. Maybe
that will get her to start watching her perfect son! UGH

Oh and if this happens again...she will be talking to the police about endangering
your DD.

I made this crystal clear to her.

Cathy, I brought that up to DD when I initially tried discussing things with her this morning. Her answer? "I missed my boyfriend-that's all I could think about".

I am a firm believer in not speaking out in anger so I had to completely remove myself from the situation this morning. Once things are said you can't take them back and being what I've been thru, well, that's something I don't partake in. When I am not so angry and filled with rage we will discuss this more.

I am grateful for the support I have been shown as well as all of the PM's I've received. I knew parenthood would be tough and I want my kids to have a better life and not make the mistakes I made......but as Amy, Meg, and Judi said, they were MY mistakes and not THEIRS so they have to make their own. But dangit-don't you think you would have learned this the FIRST TIME???

Like I said in my OP, had this happened under my roof, as upset as I would have been I would NEVER have made a teen their age walk home at that hour of the night. They would have been here until the sun came up, I would have drove them home, and then we all would have had a nice little chit chat.

I am truly grateful and appreciative of everyone here......thank you for helping me thru this. One day at a time.......

[Disney_Scarlett]

[Luvsun]

Originally Posted by wheatenwalker

Teenagers are tough! I think its a good idea to have her stay at your parents while you're working- Pixies to you!! ( you arent a bad mother-- teenagers are just tough!!!)

Just what I was thinking too!
Tons of pixies for you!