Just put my mother into a nursing home
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What a tough couple of weeks this has been and there are many more to follow. My mother has been having periods of disorientation and forgetfulness but has been living alone in an apartment and doing her own banking, shopping, cooking. Over the last month she's fallen a couple of times, has forgotten appointments and is just acting very strangely. A couple of times I caught her talking to her late husband. She's a very stubborn and independant lady, but with the help of a couple of her good friends I managed to convince her to go to the ER last week. As I was expecting and hoping, they confirmed my fears that she should no longer be on her own. Over the past week her dementia has increased rapidly and it's as if she's disappearing. When my sister came from California to help me with the transition, my mother didn't recognize her. After days of being angry and anxious on the day she was taken to the nursing home she was docile and accepting. I'm amazed that she actually seems happy there. It must in a lot of ways be a relief to her to be able to forget about all the details of life. She can just putter around and visit with the other residents. She's a former dancer and has already announced that she'll be giving dancing lessons. That should be interesting! I feel so lucky that we found a good nursing home. I've been visiting every day and each day she's sliding further into the state of fogginess. Yesterday for the first time she didn't recognize me at first. Starting next week I'll probably only be able to get there twice a week to visit, and although I don't think she'll even notice, it does make me feel guilty. It's a transition we all have to go through at some point, and it's not an easy thing do deal with! Next week I'll start closing down her apartment and affairs.
So sorry about your mother but when my former mother in law went into assisted living, she was very happy and enjoyed all the activities as well as company. By the time she needed skilled care, she was pretty limited.
It sounds like your mother is nearby, which is great. I worked in a nursing home in college and still remember how much visits meant to people.
I wish you the best. I had to put my mom into a nursing home last August (very similar situation to yours), and it is the hardest thing I've ever done in my entire life. It is heart wrenching to watch your mom deteriorate right before your eyes.
I visit WDW for the peace and quiet, it's the only week each year that my kids don't fight and argue with each other, ahhh!
Sorry you are having to do such a difficult thing! We had similar problems with my mother in law. DH would ask my professional opinions about her mental status and safety and I was always very honest. He was accepting over time and agreed that it wasn't safe for her to live at home. His sister was not as accepting and continued to ignore the obvious and when Grannie finally fell ( said that way because it was inevitable) and stayed on the floor for hours my sister in law finally saw what DH and I had been seeing for months. It has been hard on DH watching his mother go through this.
Keeping you and your mom in my thoughts!
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Oh Laurie! We had to move both my parents into assisted living 12 years ago.
With a 4 month old at home it was the only option I could see. It was hard at first, but looking back I know I did the right thing.