The Theme Park Kamikazes: Do It All or Die Trying **Now With Pictures!** About This Page:

[pflamingo]

Title: The Theme Park Kamikazes: Do It All Or Die Trying

Cast: The Kamikazes
Pat (a.k.a., PFlamingo) – grew up at WDW and never quite got over moving away
Dennis – last trip 12 years ago w/ brother, nephew, and niece – bad idea

When: June 7 – 13, 2002

Where: Animal Kingdom Lodge
Radisson Parkway (1 night)
Pat’s Parents’ House (1 night)

Reason: Me – long, hard year teaching math to 10- to 13-year-olds
Dennis – because I made it sound like so much fun
Both – because life is short, we’re not getting any younger, and we’re not willing to grow up

June 3, 2002 – Day 3 – Chapter 2: Nothing Stops a Kamikaze or It’ll Only Rain for a Few Minutes, Really

You will perhaps notice something different about pictures in this section. Like, the fact that they're not mine. The reason for this, a bit of pure brain damage on our parts, will be revealed towards the end of this episode.

I normally travel with a wide assortment of shoes, because it is my firm belief that one should always be prepared for any footwear eventuality, but this time I had taken the minimalist approach and brought only 4 pairs. For any males in the audience, anything less than 6 pairs is considered “traveling light”. Four pairs was bordering on the absurd. It was pretty obvious that the Nikes weren’t going to cut it for tromping around the MK on E-Nite, so my footwear dilemma came down to this: should I wear A) the cheap flip-flops I bought at Wal-Mart to wear to the pool, B) the dressy, high-heeled sandals I’d brought to wear to our nice dinners, or C) my ancient, raggedy Birkies. Well, the Birkies were the obvious choice, and at least the straps didn’t touch any of the tender areas, so looking like some kind of moleskin leper, I woke Dennis from his nap and we headed out for our evening’s adventure.

It was about 7:15 when we caught the bus back to the MK. The rain had let up, but the sky still looked threatening, so we had our trusty $1 Store ponchos (actually, 2/$1, what a deal!) tucked safely in our waist packs. We stopped first at City Hall to get our E-Nite wristbands. The line was a bit long, and the CM’s were announcing the alternate pick-up locations in Frontierland and Tomorrowland, but we wanted to minimize the amount of walking I had to do, and decided to wait it out. While I stood in line, Dennis bought some popcorn for me to munch on. I just love popcorn. I consider it a food group. It’s practically a reason unto itself for going to the movies. And, of course, I had to have the souvenir bucket.

We wandered over to Fantasyland, since none of the attractions there were on the E-Ride list, and rode Cinderella’s Carousel and Snow White’s Scary Adventures. I’ve always thought Snow White was a hoot, almost as good as Mr. Toad for the cheese and goofiness factor. I had no idea that this ride terrified anyone ‘til I read the reviews of it in the “Unofficial Guide”. My favorite was one that described “Grandpa” yelling “where the hell’s Snow White?” Okay, guess I just have a twisted sense of humor, but that’s what I was thinking of when we got on the ride. I tried to explain to Dennis what struck me so funny at that particular moment, but he didn’t get it. Oh well.


Looks harmless, doesn’t it? (People we don’t know in a picture we didn’t take.)

We really wanted to ride Pooh and Peter Pan again, but the lines were pretty long, and we were pretty hungry, so we decided to find some food. We walked through Cosmic Ray’s, but I wanted to see what was available at the Plaza Restaurant. Of course, right about this time it started to drizzle, and we were feeling a bit sluggish (just not as young as we used to be!), so we only got as far as the Plaza Pavilion, where we decided to eat and stake out a place to watch the fireworks. We ordered a couple of pizzas and salads, and a large Coke to share, but when we got to the window, I realized the CM had not rung up the Coke. I must have looked pretty pathetic when I discovered this – I know I said something like, “oh, no, he didn’t ring up the Coke” – because the CM behind the counter asked me what we had ordered, then proceeded to give me a free Coke. What a sweetie! I made sure to thank her for that bit of kindness.

We got a chance to “pay forward” the good deed right away. We found a table on the terrace that was under cover (as opposed to out in the rain), but still had a fairly decent view of the fireworks. We had been sitting there for a few minutes when a very tired-looking couple with a baby and a toddler arranged themselves at the table next to us. The woman said something to her husband like, “you go and get the food, and I’ll go change the baby.” He was concerned about leaving their stuff, and thought he should wait til she got back, but she pointed out that it was getting late and the food lines were pretty long, and they might not get served before the restaurant closed. I felt so sorry for them – they looked even more worn out than we did – so I said, “we’re too tired to run off with it, so we’ll watch your stuff for you.” So we arranged the table and chairs and stroller and assorted other stuff – felt like we were circling the wagons – and recruited the couple on the other side of the table to guard the chairs on that side, and they went off on their appointed errands.

When it was time for the fireworks, we all moved our chairs forward and put up the hoods on our ponchos (still drizzling), to get a better view of the fireworks. Everyone “ooooh”’ed and “ahhhh”’ed over the show, then the vast majority joined the exodus for the gates. We, however, remained among the chosen crowd for E-Ride Night! Woo-hoo!! We made a slight mistake in our strategy, though, and headed for Tomorrowland first. I think we did this because the mere thought of tromping over to Frontierland and back again made my feet hurt. Obviously everyone else had the same idea, because the lines were longer than I expected – 10 minute wait on average – not bad, but not “walk on”, either, and we found longish lines when we got over to Frontierland, too. I think we must have been moving with the herd.

Anyway, we rode Buzz Lightyear three times in a row, with about a 7-10 minute wait each time, even though the sign said 20 to 30 minutes. On the third time through, the ride stopped for some reason, just as we were approaching the end of the tunnel – the final chance to score points! Yep, we sat there and kept firing away, trying to rack up the points! I actually scored about the same as I had on the 2nd ride, when I managed to hit the coveted 100,000 point target on the robot. (YESSSSSSSSSSS!!!!!) Dennis missed it every time, and claims I didn’t tell him about it, but I would never withhold such important information from a fellow Space Ranger wannabe! In the end, I made Planetary Pilot, but he was only a lowly Cadet 1st Class. Hah!!

Next, I coaxed him into another ride on Space Mountain, hoping he wouldn’t balk too much at the idea. This time, he got the back seat, and decided it was much more comfortable than the front of the 2nd car, which is what he had before. Seems his long legs fit better back there, and he could watch the front car and anticipate the turns better. I think this is just a complicated version of “it wasn’t as scary the 2nd time”. Doesn’t matter which excuse is the real one, because when we got off and I tentatively said, “how about another ride,” he said, enthusiastically even, “okay, I think it’s fun now.” Well, slap me naked and call me Wanda!! My dilemma of being involved with a Space Mountain hater was resolved! Oh happy day – night – whatever!!! [img]images/icons/grin.gif[/img]


Ready for lift-off!!! (More people we don’t know.)

It was time to think about moving on, but I needed to put my feet up for a bit, and repatch the moleskin on the blisters before our next long trek, so we rode the TTA, which was almost completely empty. Dennis really liked this, because you get such a good view of that side of the park, and it was so pretty at night! We stayed on and rode a second time, because while he was enjoying the view the first time, I had my head down cutting up moleskin and sticking it on my feet. So we rode it again and talked about what a great time we were having, and waved to the CM’s in the shop below (who waved back, with huge smiles on their faces, just like we were the only people ever to wave to them), and just enjoyed the ride. Dennis wasn’t too interested in doing Alien Encounter, and the Astro Orbiter line was too long (why is this thing on E-nite?? It’s okay, but an E-ticket?? I don’t think so), so we decided to depart Tomorrowland and make our way to the other side of the park.

It had stopped raining, so I stuffed my poncho into the long-empty popcorn bucket that I just had to have, in spite of Dennis’ comments that I’d have to drag it around with me all night. We headed over to the Haunted Mansion, which we had deliberately saved for night because 1) we wanted to hit the non-E-ride attractions during the day, and 2) I just think it’s really cool to ride at night. I found 2 Hidden Mickey’s in there, and was so proud of myself, because I really stink at finding these.


Oooooh, scary!!! (Didn’t take this one either)

Our next stop was BTMRR, where we hit the longest line of the night – about 15 minutes. When we got off that, it was 11:45 and we only had 15 minutes left before the park closed. We decided we wanted to finish with Splash Mountain. Apparently, just about everyone else had headed for the exits, because this time we walked on, and had the boat all to ourselves. I love the view from this ride at night, and actually remembered to look out at the Castle just before the drop. Oooooh, pretty!!! For some reason though, maybe because I was distracted, the drop felt extra steep, and I got all buggy-eyed and let out a blood-curdling scream, and just knew I had to have looked ridiculous for the picture. And it wasn’t until we went past the waterfall that I realized Dennis had kept his rain poncho on. Weenie! All of this made for an absolutely hysterical picture, so once again we found ourselves picking out a photo package. This is where we got yet another dose of CM magic.


Iiii-EEEEEEE!!! (Definitely not us, nor anyone we know.)

Even though I am the alleged computer expert at my school (really just the only teacher who isn’t afraid to turn ‘em on and knows how to open MS Word), I seem to have this bizarre effect on computer equipment and can make it mysteriously stop working, just by being in the same room. So it was with the picture printer. We got the wallet-sized pictures, no problem, but the 5x7 refused to cooperate. The poor CM tried reloading the paper, resubmitting the picture, turning the printer off and on again, resubmitting the picture to a different printer – twice, but nothing seemed to work. She kept apologizing to us, and we kept smiling and joking about my strange and mystical power over computers, and finally, the picture printed. And printed. And printed. The CM thanked us for being patient, and we said, “no problem,” and she gave us the two extra 5x7’s on the house. We knew she didn’t have to do that, and we’d like to believe it had something to do with not acting like jerks and making her life miserable. The way she kept apologizing made us think she got her share of obnoxious people in that job. So we thanked her, and wished her a good night, and told her to go home and get some sleep, and started on the long walk back to the exit.

Between waiting for the pictures, and my sore-footed slow pace, it was well after midnight when hit Main Street. There were probably all of 5 other people in the whole park, so Main Street was pretty deserted. We stopped by the bakery to get some breakfast goodies, and joked around with the CM’s there about how late they had to work, and finally made it to the end of Main Street. We turned around and simultaneously caught our breath. We had the most perfect view of the Castle, and both said, “How beautiful!” and at that point we realized that we really should have brought our cameras along.

Yes, you read that right. All I can say is that we must have had a collective Alzheimer’s moment when we left the hotel, because neither of us brought a camera. I think our reasoning went something like, “well, it’s raining,” and “well, it’s gonna be dark.” So I stood there thinking what an idiot I am, and almost crying over missing this picture. Then I thought, “no, I’m not going to ruin this moment,” and Dennis and I stood there together, taking in the Castle, and Main Street, and the lights, and telling each other what a wonderful day we’d had together, and it was pretty magical. We might not have thought to do that if we were trying to get the “perfect” picture. All in all, a very nice moment.

No picture. Use your imagination! [img]graemlins/love.gif[/img]

Okay, back on the bus, time to go “home” and get some rest. As you may (or may not) know, late at night the bus drivers make extra stops to get everyone back to their resorts so they don’t have to stand around waiting for a specific bus. When our AKL bus pulled out, the driver made an announcement that we would be stopping at the WL first, then going on to AKL. Okay. We can live with that. We got to the WL and the driver said, in a perfectly clear voice, “Wilderness Lodge & Ft. Wilderness Campground”. A couple of people got off the bus, then we heard this huge commotion at the back, and had to wait several minutes while this couple wrestled their Ford Expedition-model stroller off the bus. Fine. Just before he closed the door, the driver said, “Next stop, Animal Kingdom Lodge,” at which point the woman piped up, “You mean, this isn’t the Animal Kingdom Lodge???” Arggghhhh!! So we waited a few more minutes while they wrestled the mega-stroller back onto the bus. I probably could have overlooked this faux pas, but this woman proceeded to call someone on her cell phone and give them directions to AKL in a loud and rather unpleasant voice, while her son gave a loud, sharp whistle every 20 seconds or so. All the way back to the hotel.


NOT the AKL! (And not our picture, either)

Okay, I’m probably just turning into a crabby, old, female version of a curmudgeon, but this was ANNOYING!!! Now, I have to say, we encountered far more pleasant adults and well-behaved children (all of whom seemed to be having a great time) than we did rude adults and obnoxious, uncontrolled kids. In fact, we actually complimented a number of parents on how sweet their kids were (typical response was, “yeah, they’ve got you snowed”), so it’s not that we don’t like kids. We just think they should be taught some manners. But then, when you see how lacking in manners their parents are, it’s hard to fault the kids. Anyway, we were quite happy to get off the bus, and yes, we said several times on the way up the sidewalk, “Is this the Animal Kingdom Lodge?”, and no, they couldn’t have heard us, because they were still back at the bus wrestling with the Sherman tank. And we wouldn’t have done this if they hadn’t’ve been so obnoxious after they got back on the bus at WL. Okay, so we’re both curmudgeons.


IS the AKL! (But still not our picture.)

We took quick showers, and fell into bed. Our original plan had been to get up early and do MGM all day, but after two days of intensive touring, we admitted that the ravages of age had overtaken us. We had discussed other options for Saturday throughout the evening, but by the time we hit the sack, I think we were on “revised Plan D”. And I’m quite sure that the last thing either of us said was, “Is this the Animal ...?”

Next Episode: Plan D or Aging Kamikazes Need To Rest!

[ 07-27-2002, 10:45 PM: Message edited by: pflamingo ]

[inkydinkydoo]

You're crackin' me up with your pictures, Pat! And, I'm lovin' your report.

Inky (or Pat, part deux -- is that how you spell two in French?)

[GoofyMom]

Well, slap me naked and call me Wanda!!

<font size="2" face="Comic Sans MS, Arial">[img]graemlins/ukid.gif[/img] Where do you come up with sayings like this?

I'm totally enjoying your TR, Pat. So sorry you had to deal with sore tootsies. [img]images/icons/frown.gif[/img]

[luvnwdwgal]

Pat, you are a hoot! Loving your trip report! Hurry with more please! [img]images/icons/grin.gif[/img]

[coffeechef]

Just love your report!! You are too Funny. Ford Expedition Stroller. I love it.
When we did E Night We found that Space mountain was busy the last Half hour. But don't you just love E Nights.

[Bert & Sully]

So far so good! Gotta agree with you on the "genetic rudeness" and "Sherman Tanks'" [img]images/icons/wink.gif[/img] stuff [img]images/icons/grin.gif[/img] !

Elaine

[Elliot'sDragon]

I finally got around to reading your trip report. I'm loving it. Great detail. And great reason for going. ( I have six weeks until school year starts.)

[AKLRULZ]

This is an incredible report! I just caught up and I'm in stiches! [img]images/icons/grin.gif[/img]

[tikibird]

Pat,

I am DYING imagining you attaching moleskin to your feet on TTA! [img]images/icons/grin.gif[/img]

Hope you have time to post more soon!!!!